


My last words

by Deandeanmoose



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Character Death, F/M, Lots of dead characters, Memories, Past Relationship(s), Sad, sorry i wrote this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-31
Updated: 2017-12-31
Packaged: 2019-02-08 22:41:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,452
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12874587
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Deandeanmoose/pseuds/Deandeanmoose





	My last words

As Dean stood by the flames, another friend was freed of this living hell they called life. Only this time, this time it got closer then he knew possible. Sam and Castiel gave him space as he leaned against the impala with a beer in hand. They knew he wouldn't be the same, he knew he wouldn't be the same. They walked away towards the front of the car and waited for Dean. But Dean wouldn't leave so soon, at least physically he would because mentally he was gone like her. He pulled out a small piece of folded paper, and opened it to read.

_Dean-o,_

He took a sharp breath and forced himself to focus.  _ **You promised to read it when you burned her bones. You promised.**_ He blinked back the tears and pushed on.

_If your reading this, I am gone. Hopefully in a shootout, blaze of glory._

He smiled faintly at the paper before him as his mind replayed her final moments, the way she took the bullet for him, fell down to the floor without even a goodbye. The way the light left her eyes and he swore he could feel her ghost trying to hold him as he cried over her. 

_I know you feel betrayed, we promised forever and the ring you gave me damn near made this perfect. But as we know, hunters never last long in this world._

He held the ring still on it's chain, tangled through his fingers. His thumb rubbed the old diamond and he sat the paper down. He was trying to continue but couldn't push himself to do so... Until the cool breeze danced on the back of his neck and ear, he could hear her voice in his head. Or he thought it was in his head as he wished it was real. ' _You can do this, keep reading... For me Dean-o.'_ He lifted the torn notebook paper to keep reading.

_ I knew you would find this note quickly, behind my favorite picture of us. The one I always carried with me. _

He could picture it, the one of him carrying the red headed blue eyed angel before they knew angels were real. It felt like yesterday he was sixteen carrying the fourteen year old back to the house after they snuck out to talk in the junk yard. She had fell and a clear snap sounded as she cried. Dean will always remember how his closest thing to love he ever found was in tears and all he wanted to do was fix it... The picture Sam took before Bobby rushed in and saved the day after sending the boys upstairs. 

_We have came a long way, lost plenty of friends. You can't latch on to me, you have to move on. No sitting around pouting and drinking yourself into a stupor. I know I usually pull you out of it but I'm sure Sam and Cas can handle it this time. After Kevin, Charlie, and the others... You know you have to push through._

His breath hitched, the names flooding him with the memories he wanted to forget most. The way his two favorite red heads sat talking about Lord of the rings and Harry Potter even though he knew she only indulged Charlie on that topic. The way those two could spend hours debating which they preferred, and then he would side with his girl even if he didn't want to. 

He watched the fire dance as he thought back to how Kevin and her got along so well. The late night study sessions and staying at the bunker when she said they needed 'bro time'. He remembered how she pushed more then anyone to help Kevin's ghost.

The fire was burning down the logs building a small tent over his beloved fiance's body. He felt tears rushing and then pressure on his chest, almost as if arms were embracing him. The slight smell of her perfume, faint and sweet. The soft breeze on his neck, making the small hairs raise as if she was kissing his neck like she loved to do. He lifted the paper up, and read the best he could through the tears.

_I love you Dean, always have and I always will. So if you need motivation, do it for me. Just because this new death finally collected me, doesn't mean you have to be right behind me. You still have work love, you have to keep going. Just because you see death at a market, doesn't mean you have to run away and meet your demise in a town far away. Be brave Dean, you were always braver then me._

He sat the paper down on the trunk and bowed his head. He couldn't look up at the flames stealing his love away. Couldn't finish the letter. Couldn't make a deal to save her.... He couldn't do anything for her now. He couldn't kill death to save her, sell his soul... Do anything she always begged him not to. He was lost, for the first time, truly lost.

He could hear her whisper in his ear, ' _Dean... Baby... You have too.You honestly have too.' His_  heart pounded through his ears, but almost as if someone was lifting his hands, the paper came back up. His fingers gripped the paper and his tears crashed down on the paper.

_Goodbye Dean, hopefully one day we can be together. You know if the nothingness allows it... Or wherever death takes me._

He closed his eyes as the memories flooded him. The two of then having their first kiss in the back of the impala. The school dance where Dean took her after driving back from Austin Texas, all night drive. The time she surprised him on his twenty-first birthday, the night they spent together. The first of many, before he knew it she was almost a part of him. After everything, his deal and death, the apocalypse, the cage match between his brothers, purgatory, the mark of Cain... Everything. She was there even when he was infatuated with Amara. He had actually bought a ring and proposed, he was committed to marrying her at some point. He promised he would.

 _'Please... Please finish Dean.'_ The words slipped in his ear and he knew he finished the note. He lifted up the ring on the chain, he knew how this would go. He wanted the ring, the one good thing he gave her. But if he kept it, she could be a ghost and he didn't want her to suffer. He kissed the ring and looked to make sure that Sam and Cas weren't looking.

"Goodbye Grace.... I love you. I always did." He cleared his throat and held it out towards the fire, "finally, you get to be happy."

 _'I was always happy with you.'_ The words sounded as if they came from against his skin, and the softly but brisk cold that engulfed him was pleasant, or well him knowing what it was is pleasing to his senses. 

"I'm sorry... I love you." He swung the ring softly towards her burning body and let go as the voice whispered in his ear one last time.

' _I love you too.'_

He let the tears crash as everything disappeared. The voice was gone. The cold embrace, his pimpled skin due to the touch, the feeling of her kissing his skin one last time...  All of it left. Just like the smell of her perfume. He clutched the photo and notebook paper in his hand, his lips quivering and heart pounding as he knew she was truly gone. 

Before he could even try to pull himself together, Sam and Cas came over. They rested a hand on his shoulders and his lips slowly parted for air.

"She was here... She spoke to me, touched me." Dean's words were cut short by Sam.

"Dean she's gone now. We have to move on. She would want us to finish our mission, destroy British men of letters and stop the Nephilim" 

Dean nodded and slowly got up and walked to the driver's seat, "let's go. Grace deserves revenge."

Sam and Cas exchanged a small look as Crowley came walking up with the biggest update, they knew revenge wasn't best but Dean needed this. He just lost the love of his life, he needed to gain some touch of justice for this.  _ **They think killing all hunters will work? They just killed the wrong girl, and they just pissed off the wrong Winchester.**_ He barely waited for them to get in, his mind focused on finishing the task at hand.  _ **I love you Grace, I always did.**_


End file.
